Hello! Hello! Hello!
h e l l o ( to self)!
I am saying hello. To each and everyone of you.
Ask yourself, When was the last time you got to say hello to yourself, hello to the earth, hello to creator.
Your inner world, your womb, your heart. When was the last time you looked in the mirror, and said
I
love
you.
It took me 20 odd years to finally say hello to myself, to finally inner stand my inner me, my inner child, Iqbaal.
I asked myself, no, I asked my inner child, my inner babygirl who was hiding all these years behind shame and pain, I asked her…
Who were you before the reckoning, who were you before the programming, who were you before you knew what hate or fear was.
She replied, I was curious, connected, creating, cosmic, she said I was you behind all your masks.
I asked her, what are you most hurt about?
She said, I am most hurt that you hardly ever stood up for us, that instead you crouched in fear, that you, got in line.
And thus you walked into your cage, choked, and chained.
I become captured, closed, I withdrew cause that’s what you decided to do, to not feel, to disconnect, to forget me.
I whaled in our river of tears, I am so sorry baby, I had to.
I had to survive in this cold cruel world, I had to protect us the only way I knew.
I am so sorry but thats the only way I knew we’d survive.
“Sigh”
She whimpered I know.. I knew.
And so I begged her to forgive me, to give me one more chance as I promise to stand up for us this time.
& to always put her first every time.
No more surviving.
Today we are creating, today we are flourishing, today we are feeling.
I chanted to her
Today I will chose my path, today I will decide what I want from this life, today I will not stand in line.
And so today I will walk away and create my own whacky weird authentically me path.
Today I chose me.
Again and again and again.
And for that
Tomorrow they will burn me at the stake…
but for today I will happily dance on my pedestal for even a sliver of connection to my essence
!!!!!I was never made to fall in line
Now
I am tired, tired of how much the world doesn’t want us to say hello with a smile but instead,
YES SIR with our minds bowed and hearts charred.
When did it become wrong to question, to get lost, to love?
I am tired of how much my womb is attacked again and again by ones who know and fear the magic of womb-man
and by the others who unknowingly hate and oppress womb-man in ignorance….in privilege…in arrogance.
I am tired of the rape, that sisters and brothers endure due to the state of disconnection, how will we ever stand up for each other when we hardly ever stand up for ourselves or can’t even stand up for our inner child,
for our earth,
for our healing.
Apart of me doesn’t know who to blame and for so long I blamed the world.
That was until I said hello to myself and finally walked out of line.
– Iqbaal